
John Mayer on Jessica Simpson is bed...
"Yeah, that girl is like crack cocaine to me. Sexually it was crazy. That's all I'll say. It was like napalm, sexual napalm." But of course that's not all he'll say. He continues:
"There are people in the world who have the power to change our values. Have you ever been with a girl who made you want to quit the rest of your life? Did you ever say, 'I want to quit my life and just f--kin' snort you? If you charged me $10,000 to f--k you, I would start selling all my s--t just to keep f--king you."
Wow

John Mayer when asked if he still loves Jennifer Aniston...
"Yes, always. I'll always be sorry that it didn't last. In some ways I wish I could be with her. But I can't change the fact that I need to be 32."
FYI, being 32 means "I don't want to pet dogs in the kitchen." And also tweeting, which Jen just didn't get.
"One of the most significant differences between us was that I was tweeting. There was a rumor that I had been dumped because I was tweeting too much. That wasn't it, but that was a big difference. The brunt of her success came before TMZ and Twitter. I think she's still hoping it goes back to 1998. She saw my involvement in technology as courting distraction. And I always said, 'These are the new rules.' You have to show that you don't take yourself seriously."
I love you John Mayer, drop the old hags and we can fall in love and tweet all day together... Miss Priss